"The mind in itself
is not dysfunctional.
It is a wonderful tool.
Dysfunction sets in when you
seek yourself in it
and mistake it for who you are."
Eckhart Tolle,
Author of The Power of Now.
We mistakenly think of habits and addictions as moral problems. This is a mistake that keeps us stuck on the merry-go-round of trying to quit. What if you saw habits and addictions as simply a human condition common to everyone (name one person that doesn't have an unwanted habit and/or addiction). From this point of view we can use our "human condition" as an opportunity to (1) develop character, (2) define what we really value, and (3) get connected intimately with ourselves. In other words, it is an opportunity to spiritually grow.
How do habits and addictions develop in the first place? In typical circumstances, habits and addictions develop in response to emotional pain. We instinctually move away from emotional pain towards pleasure. How do we do this? The ways we have learned to move away from emotional pain by becoming overly identified with our intellect or we pick up behaviors and experiences that destract us from the emotional pain.
The avoidance of emotional pain is reinforced by the pleasure we get from certain behaviors and experiences. As we continue the behaviors we get further away from our emotions. We become more deeply embedded in the behaviors. After time, emotions feel more threatening and the pleasurable behaviors more appealing. This is how we develop habits and addictions.
When we are distracted by behaviors that keep us from feeling, we never learn to face emotional pain head on and resolve it. This creates an imbalance and has us seeking relief from people, places, and things outside ourselves. By looking outside ourselves for relief we loose an opportunity for a powerful and loving relationship with the wholeness within. When you learn to resolve emotional pain you will see that emotional pain is illusionary that has you running for nothing. The best way to stop habits and addictions is to stop avoiding your emotional pain. Resolve emotional pain and you will have access to a power and inner peace that is beyond description.
Whenever you seek support and guidance to eliminate habits and/or addictions, do not look at it as a failure. Look at it as an “opportunity” to bring you back to the best of Who You Are. Returning to the best of Who You Are is an invitation. It is an invitation that I hope you will accept.
In Alcoholics Anonymous there is a saying, "The farthest vertical drop is from the head to the heart". The reason that this rings so true is because when we drop down into our bodies we feel feelings. These feelings are usually the uncomfortable feelings such as a knot in your stomach, a feeling of emptiness or loneliness, a sense of impending danger, and so on. We live in our heads to avoid these uncomfortable feelings. This is why addiction is so commonplace. Using a substance takes away the uncomfortably within.
Twelve years ago I joined a group called "Living in Process". This group focused on feeling feelings without intellectualizing them. At the time I was living completely in my head. It took me three years of participation in this group to learn not to be afraid of my feelings. In the Living in Process group I learned to dive into any feeling and feel it until it went away. I was always amazed by the sense of peace that occurred after the feeling dissolved. About two years ago I came upon the work of Tom Stone, CEO of Great Life Technologies, who developed a much more efficient way to resolve any feeling by going directly into the energy of the feeling. Feelings seen as energy is based upon the theories of quantum physics that suggest everything in the universe is made of energy. Painful emotions and feelings are literally a form of energy in our bodies. The energy from feelings feel as real as the computer I am typing from because they are both made up of energy. We avoid the energy of a feeling because we hold a pervasive belief that we will be overwhelmed by the energy.
Since I have been feeling into the energy of feelings my life has really changed in so many fabulous ways. The best result I can share here is that I now have a continuous feeling of inner peace. This sense of inner peace is also reported by many of my clients who have been feeling into their feelings.
In the past I held a strong belief that if only my circumstances would change I would feel better about myself. With that belief my focus was always on the circumstances. Focusing on the circumstances was a very limiting perspective because I was only looking from outside-in rather than inside-out. From an outside-in perspective I missed opportunities to be fully and powerfully related to my Self.
The change to an inside-out perspective came when I learned to mentally "unplug" from the circumstance and bring my awareness from my head (always thinking) into my body. Wow! Initially there was a lot of resistance to being in my body. I learned through this practice that focusing my attention inward accessed a tremendous amount of personal power that was always there but hidden.
I encourage you to take several moments each day to mentally unplug your attention from the circumstances of your life and drop your attention into your body. Let go of any resistance to being in the body and just rest there. You will find as you practice this that you are a great place to be!
The book Busting Loose from the Money Game, by Robert Schienfeld, turbo charges Laws of Attraction. Why? There are several tools in the Busting Loose from the Money Game book that can help align energy really efficiently. One of the tools is to dissolve the discomfort in the body that is present when there are resistant and limiting thoughts. Dissolving the discomfort allows us to easily align energy with Source Energy.
Negative thoughts (i.e. resistance and limitations) almost always come with
feeling energies in the body. These feeling energies are fueled by core beliefs from our conditioning. Core beliefs are much deeper than negative thoughts. The feeling energies in the body and core beliefs are the “glue” that hold negative thoughts in place. If we want to stop negative thinking for good then resolving the feeling energies in the body and dismantling core beliefs is the way to go. Busting Loose from the Money Game is the perfect road map to do this.
In the theory of manifestation or “Laws of Attraction” our thoughts attract what we want in life. Think negative thoughts and the Universe yields negative experiences. Think positive thoughts and the Universe yields positive experiences. Scheinfeld stays out of the positive or negative realm and suggests that negativity is just the illusion of limitation, and limitation is part of the Human Game to hide our Powerful Selves from our self. We can change the “game” by resolving limitation and realigning with Source Energy within. When we realign with Source Energy, magic naturally happens because Source Energy is Who We Are!
Have you ever tried to shift a negative thought to attract what you want? I know it has been a challenge for me. Negative thoughts are like rubber bands; they snap back, and sometimes they snap back with an “ouch”. For the Laws of Attraction to work we need to eliminate negative thought and think a better feeling thought until we are realigned with our desired intention. For example, if we want a new job but our thoughts are focused on the National Job Index, then we are in negative thought. The work is to move your negative thoughts to a better feeling place by starting with a better thought, then a better thought, and so on, until you are aligned with the feeling of “the perfect job is waiting for me”.
This process is difficult when we are gripped by an emotion or highjacked by a string of negative thoughts.
This is where the work from Busting Loose from the Money Game comes in. Whenever you have a negative thought (limiting belief), Schienfeld suggests that we feel into the discomfort in the body and dissolve that energy. Once it is dissolved then we can actively align our energy with Source Energy (who we are) because we are no longer caught in the grip of the energy or the “illusion” as he calls it.
For example, if you are trying to attract capital for a venture, and you are not getting any leads, negative thoughts creep in. The thoughts might be something like, “this doesn’t work”, “everyone else has money”, and “I will never have what I want”. If you really look at these statements you will see that 1) they are limiting thoughts, 2) they are rooted in deeper core beliefs, 3) they are judgmental. Whenever judgment is present you will find a feeling energy in the body. These feeling energies are unresolved feelings that stem from our core beliefs and conditioning. These feeling energies are uncomfortable at the very least, and at the most, completely overwhelming. Being in the grip of this energy makes it difficult to talk ourselves out of negative thinking because the energy gives us the illusion that negativity is “real”. Scheinfeld offers this concept instead: “Everything is an illusion”. Scheinfeld means everything. If everything is an illusion that means we make up limitation. It is our conditioning that has us believe in the illusion of limitation. Dismantle this conditioning and we naturally come to the understanding that the Laws of Attraction are Absolute.
The biggest hurdle in applying the Laws of Attraction is our tenacious negative thinking and limiting beliefs. Schienfeld gives us a powerful tool; dissolve the feeling energies that lock negative thinking and limitation in place. The concept of dissolving the feeling energy is also found in the teachings of Eckhart Tolle, Power of Now, Tom Stone, Pure Awareness, and John Ruskan, Emotional Clearing.
Stone, Tolle, Ruskan, and Scheinfeld all agree; resolve the negative feeling energy in the body and we have access to Consciousness. If you align yourself with this energy, this energy that is You, and the Universe yields to all your desires. If you continue to align yourself with the Power Within you will continue to expand your experience of Consciousness.
Busting Loose from the Money Game gives us a great road map for resolving feeling energies. Combine the ideas from the Busting Loose from the Money Game with Laws of Attraction and you’ll get naturally turbo charged to your desires.
For most people, “diving” into negative feeling energies to resolve them is challenging because of our conditioning that has us believe that it is dangerous to dive into any feelings. Coaching can give you the support and guidance to resolve these negative feeling energies and dismantle conditioning that has you believing in limitation, as well as expand your Conscious connection.
If you would like more information on coaching in this area or to sign up for a complimentary session click here.
